Chasing after the perfect gift
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There’s Wisdom in World Proverbs

The power of a considered gift is stunning. The world has told us that for years:

Gifts break rocks and melt hearts. —Uruguayan

Now that’s a high standard. How am I ever going to melt the hearts of everyone on my list? What happens if gifts exchanged aren’t “equal”? And how can I say “Thanks” and mean it?

I could have talked it over with my dog or asked Emily Post, but instead I decided to consult the whole wide world. Listen in on the conversation.

Is it the gift or the smile behind it that melts the heart?
© Kemal Bas / iStock

Hey, World.  Where’s the Perfect Gift?

My husband Bob has it all—good looks, a fun personality. . . and too much stuff.

Ralph here. Ralph Waldo Emerson. Though my advice is not a proverb, it’s still quotable: The only gift is a portion of thyself. 

I don’t think this means to give him an arm and a leg—something more like an experience or an adventure, just spending time together?

I may be Author Unknown, but—yes, you’re right: Every day is a gift, and that is why it’s called the present. 

Oh, I see. The gift of time for Bob will melt his heart and keep clutter away. And here’s some real help from Brooke McAlary: 30 ideas for clutter-free gifts.

Time together! For this year’s gift giving, get out of the house and keep the clutter from getting in.
© Fuse

What If My Gift Isn’t “Equal”?

There are so many ways “equal” plays with your brain. Equal to last year. Equal to what I get. Equal in cost. Equal in expectations. Help me, world! Give me the gift of some good advice.

Giving is not trading. —Swahili

Hands that give also receive. —Ecuadoran

Wait a minute. That’s a contradiction, I think. Tell me more.

What you give you get, ten times over. —Yoruba

Starting to get it now. The gifts don’t have to be equal because just the giving gives the giver a rewarding gift, right?

Right!: A bit of the fragrance always clings to the hand that gives you roses. —Chinese

A good gift is thoughtful, chosen with your friend in mind.
That makes it equal, no matter what the cost.
© Plush Studios / Blend Images

OK, I’m learning a lot, but here’s one thing I already know: The fun in giving is thinking about what jazzes your friend and connecting your gift to it. If you have a vampire friend, this means, “Don’t give garlic!”

The perfect gift for a vampire is NOT garlic!
© Elisanth_ / iStock

But if you have a granddaughter who loves music and you have a talent, share it.

Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere. —Chinese

Christella Morris at Crawl the Line must already know this bit of wisdom, too—she gives such good ideas and even better reasons to share your experience and your time.

OIC again: When two people give each other something each one loves, the gifts are always equal.

Passing on your gifts may be the most perfect gift of all.
© Jack Hollingsworth / Photodisc

What’s the Best Way to Say “Thanks”?

Long time ago, I learned about the mouth of the gift horse. As horses get older, their gums recede. Look closely and you can tell if the horse is old (long in the tooth) or new for you.  Guess that means it’s bad to inspect a gift too closely.

You can say that again, and how many ways do we have to tell you?

Look not a gift horse in the mouth. —Danish, Dutch, French, Italian, Spanish, Romanian

If you receive a gift, don’t measure it. —Kenyan

You do not look at a sheep someone has given you. —Swahili

 Alright. No inspecting, but—you know—it’s hard to hide your true feelings.

Tell me how you really feel!
© Aleksandr Frolov / Hemera

Being a bad liar, I need a world of help here. Last year, a good friend gave me a “Santa Liar, Pants on Fire” (perhaps to honor my obsession with honesty). It was a candle, and you get what part lit up. And you can imagine the position.

How can I say a genuine “Thanks” for that?

A stone from the hand of a friend is an apple. —Moroccan

The giver makes the gift precious. —American

Gee, thanks. All I needed was a new view.  Now I know if I focus on the thoughtful giver and not the gift, I’m sure to smile.

No matter how small the gift or the giver,
a look into your daughter’s eyes makes her gift special.
© Todd Wright / Blend Images

And with that, we wish you a happy gift-giving season, full of the proverbial wisdom from world cultures. Thanks for opening our posts this year. We hope the “Oh, I see” moments inside are gifts that put a smile on your face all year ’round.

Comment on this post below, or inspire insight with your own OIC Moment here.

Joshua Becker offers a treasure trove of intangible gifts that you can pass along to your children. 

Swahili proverbs are from the Center for African Studies at the University of Illinois. “Every day is a gift. . .” is from Inspiration Falls. All others are from one or more of the cross-cultural collections at Special Dictionary, Quotes & Sayings, or Proverbia.